Small Talk Guide (How to approach someone correctly!)

You’re an awkward person in society? Yeah? Well, me too. I guess all of us are –  in a way. I bet you are now thinking about a few people in your personal surrounding that never seem to get socially awkward, but trust me – they do!

You know what I’m talking about. Those times when you stand in front of some people and you just don’t know what to talk about? The whole situation is just getting more and more uncomfortable. Well – then this guide is for you:

Small talk

  • Don’t be scared! And even if you are, practice you Pokerface so nobody notices.
    • Nobody is perfect so relax. We all go into a conversation unknowingly of what might come out of it in the end.

  • Try not to think of yourself as worth less than the person you are trying to talk to.
    • That person obviously decided to listen to you so don’t act inferior because that might make the other person awkward. It also is a bad starting point of a Small Talk.
      • Even if it is your boss you are trying to converse with, look them into the eyes. We are all just humans!

  • Find a topic
    • Now, I know this is the hardest part of a Small Talk. Finding a topic. What most people end up doing is simply talk about the weather, which gets dull after a while.
    • So how do you find a suitable topic?
      • Well this really does depend on the person your talking to. If you are working or going to school together – you might want to talk about something related to that. Just make sure both of you know what’s going on. (Don’t make nasty remarks about someone else they know – that can go terribly wrong.)
      • You should also prevent talking about yourself. You might have a really interesting life and a lot to talk about. But this can seem arrogant and is a really one-sided conversation.
      • Select a topic that both of you are comfortable with. Maybe a sport? But don’t choose to talk about football if the other person can’t relate to it and ends up just listening to you again.
      • If you don’t have anything in common try researching their hobbies on their social media. You can then start a conversation with asking them about things they like which gives you the control over the situation but makes the other person the speaker.

  • Stay positive and smile (If possible do that all the time, not just during a Small Talk)

  • When you realize that you run out of ideas on what to talk about try an “escape plan”.
    • This is also dependent on who you are talking to.
      • If it is someone from work or school use something related to that. For example you still need to print you assignment, finish your emails or research books at the library.
        • (Don’t use a lie. That might hurt the other person)
      • Don’t use hunger or the bathroom as an excuse because that can be awkward and backfire.

Good luck! (^_^) And of course these tips only apply for people you feel uncomfortable talking to. With friends you don’t need to be so stuck up.

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